Anxiety . . it has been a while.

So I do have a new picture edited but I am not able to post it due to the models request. Boo . . . I know. It is pretty awesome and my teacher has already told me I should try to send it to a card company, but if the model doesn't want it blogged, he obviously doesn't want people opening their birthday/sympathy/happy marriage/its a boy/it's a girl cards with his face on it. The point of this is, sorry I don't have anything new to show you at this point.
Which now brings us to last night. I had a migraine all day from the moment I woke up. I went on a hike with Michael and Josh and then to a park with Michael, Josh and Sam. Anywho, later on we watched Requiem for a dream which was for sure a head spinner. Although the plot was sad and disturbing, I really enjoyed the way it was filmed. I left Michaels and dropped Sam off went home, got in bed, had a short wierd dream and woke up at around 1:20am with anxiety. The heat was incredible. My room was 74 degrees, but felt like 100 and I was without a fan. I first thought, I need to drink water so I guzzled down a gallon of it. Didn't work. Then I thought, I need to eat something. The only thing to eat in my house is frozen veggies and smoothie ingredients. Green beans it is! Didn't work. Okay so my next step . . . . obviously facebook. I will facebook for a while and that will make me feel better. Didn't work. Deep Breathing was the next step. In and out. In and out. Didn't work.

Strange craving while in the midst of anxiety: All I wanted to was to kiss with someone.

So here I am downing green beans and water completley naked. Now . . . who wouldn't want to makeout with that, right?
4am rolls around and it is time. I popped a full xanax and slowly my muscles relaxed and my eyes shut. I was suppose to return equipment at 7am but xanex got the best of me and I slept like a baby until 10:30.
It has been a while since my last panic attack and this one wasn't that bad. I bet it was the heat that brought it on and the stress of my life in 2 months.

PS: green beans taste better with oil, salt and pepper.